The following story is a little detailed, but bear with me...I do have a point.
I'm not sure what the deal is, but lately I have been feeling unusually frustrated with the everyday challenges of life.
Today I drove my 8 year old daughter and two of her friends to tennis. I picked them up at school, gave them all a snack and a bottle of water, picked my 4 year old up at her school and proceeded to the tennis club. In the car they were being normal, LOUD little girls, but they were a little over the top. They spilled popcorn all over the back seat and in my opinion were acting obnoxious. It was really getting on my nerves.
When we got to the market Catherine decided she wanted to go in the HUGE cart with the kid's car in the front. Cool, no problem at all. Half way through the cereal aisle she climbs out and starts crying. I could see she was exhausted, she could barely sit up in the cart. Soooo, I had to carry her throughout the supermarket while attempting to maneuver the 18 wheeler cart through the NARROW aisles. As I struggled to get groceries you would think at least one person would give me a sympathetic smile. Oh no...all I got were looks of complete annoyance. After all, I should have had the manners to leave my child at home with the nanny. (Oh shoot, I forgot I DON'T HAVE A NANNY!!! Sorry b---tches.)
FINALLY I managed to get to checkout. As I tried to get through the checkout line I realized it was too narrow for my cart. I tried backing out. No dice. I pushed forward. Nada. At that point I couldn't take it anymore. I positioned my foot squarely on the back of the cart and PUSHED. With a loud screach the cart careened forward almost freeing me. The checkout boy's face got all red and the manager yelled at me and told me I should have gone through the handicapped aisle. Ooops. In my state of extreme frustration I didn't see it. Silly psycho me.
At that point the people in the adjoining checkout lines were staring at me. I felt completely embarrassed and ashamed of my behavior.
I did my best to maintain some dignity. I paid for my food, loaded the cart with bags and then with one last KICK dislodged the cart from the tight squeeze between the candy display and the conveyor belt. I bid the checkout boy a fond farewell and left the store, trying to keep my head held high.
Not one of my better moments. I did, however, realize that I need to work on chilling out. I lost my cool, publicly in a store full of women whose life's work is to look perfect 24/7.
I tried to figure out what's bugging me, enough to make me act like a 2 year old in public and this is my conclusion. I'm not always the most consistent mom. I'm pretty lenient and they are taking advantage of me. If I don't take the bull by the horns now, I think I'm really going to be in for it!
My sister started having children ten years before me, she doesn't take crap from any of them. I used to think she was so strict. Now I know why.
One of my friends told me, "You need a big glass of wine tonight." I don't think that's the answer. I think what I need is a bottle of Valium and a parenting book.
The sooner the better.
The sooner the better.
25 comments:
Hello from another psycho. It is hard to be consistent particularly when you are tired from parenting-do you see the circular argument? I feel for you. I hate those damn car carts. If I had been there-I wouldn't have given you a dirty look, but I would have helped you kick the hell out of the cart and given the manager the stink eye for yelling at you-WHO does HE think he is, anyway?
Clearly, you are insane.
I know, because we are one in the same.
Here's an idea...next time you're there, huff and puff that YOU have to unload and reload your cart yourself, because at YOUR REGULAR Gucci Grocery store they pull the carts around the back and do it for you (the Fancy Market in my town does that).
Eh, not that I'd actually do that. But wouldn't it be cool?
See, this is why I have always maintained that parenting books should come WITH valium;) Hope tomorrow is calmer.
I was getting ready to ask you how you think you lost your cool....but I guess kicking the cart to get the damn thing through the aisle was it? The manager is the one that should be ashamed of himself. I personally refuse to use those since I can't push them around worth a darn. The kids know they can only ride in it if they go to the store with daddy. I hope things go a bit smoother the rest of the week.....and if you want to know, we use the "smart discipline" system at our house and it has really helped a ton. I wrote about it a few times back in the beginning (October'ish). Whatever you end up doing just, YOU ARE A GREAT MOM!!!
Its called Lexapro and if you call your doctor while having "one of those days", he WILL give you a scrip.
I hate those huge carts and refuse to use them. That being said why the hell do they have them if they don't fit in the checkout aisles? They only fit in the handicap aisle?
If the manager yelled at me instead of helping me I think I would have walked out without the groceries. Someone should have been offering to help you. And I mean the staff not the judgmental bitches that were staring at you.
F them anyway!
too funny. being everything to everyone can wear one out. I always feel better after I ovulate.
you are NOT psycho you are NORMAL. and why do they have those carts if they don't fit through the checkout ???
I didn't know a&p was for the perfect folks, i think i have gone once. good to know and i will stay away.
i always feel that living in our area is a bit stressful, the amount of money is disgusting. the snobbery is amazing to me. hang in there, hugs to you. i would have gotten next to you and pushed that cart through. FO&*((*& the stepford wives.
The aisle should have been wider.
That's the bottom line. Blame that shi-ot on stupid, non-daddy engineers.
Dumbasses. Don't they that will bring out the psycho in all of us.
I say move to ATL and I'll take you to Super T...the aisles are nice and wide and pharmacists has lots of drugs.
Oh girl. There are so many ladies around here whose exclusive job it is to look perfect. F that. And F that store manager! What a jerk! Why have the carts in the store if they don't fit down the regular check-out aisles?
Have a better day today :)
I think that you are tired (goes without saying, you have kids!) and no patience for bad behavior. Theirs, not yours. First of all, though, why do you care what others think? Honestly, unless you are being nasty to others or vicious to your children, no one has the right to judge. If their stares upset you, THEY aren't the ones suffering, no?
I'm with So Tired - I would have walked out without the groceries. After calmly explaining - in oh-so-acid tones - that IF the carts only fit through the handicapped aisles they should have a sign on them saying so. And IF the bagger saw you having trouble and didn't (a) stop you from attempting the impossible or (b) offer to help, then he needs a refresher on the definition of Customer SERVICE. And IF the manager felt it appropriate to raise his/her voice to a customer, maybe he/she should change jobs to something more appropriate like Rollerderby. And then you could all have take-out chinese for dinner (again), along with your valium.
I would also make a point to send a note or email to A&P corporate headdquarters. In my experience, in many other states, A&P is a good basic store (definitely no right to claim snobbery) and they know they can't afford to piss off customers who are willing to speak their minds. (I'd also make every possible effort to never go there again, and tell everyone in your neighborhood/circle of friends how lousy that store is).
Oh god - I hate those damn "car" carts. I can NEVER maneuver them.
The manager seriously yelled at you? Next time, give him a sweet smile, walk away from the cart and say "I'm sorry, my daughter isn't feeling well. Would you mind putting these things back?" and walk out of the store.
Sure you'll have to repeat the entire grocery shopping elsewhere later on, but isn't it worth it just to pay the manager back for his rudeness, extricate yourself from an uncomfortable situation, and be able to complete your shopping in a more sympathetic/normal environment?
I'm sorry you had a bad day- it's been a long winter up here, and that stupid and rude manager didn't help a bit....hopefully today will be better.
Bless your heart. Poor you.
Those big carts are hell. That manager was totally out of place! I like Christine's idea, that's brilliant.
I hope the glass of wine did you some good, and the book... that's to use as a coaster, right?
I see so much of me in this post. I always get an all too familiar knotted, warm feeling in my chest right before I blow my fuse. Sometimes I am mentally stable enough to recognize the warning signs before I lose it and walk away or take a few deep, cleansing breaths. Other times I just go ape shit crazy. Never fear...you are normal.
We're both nuts.
I hope today you are rereading this post and laughing! I hate those stupid carts!!! I was pushing one out the door to my car one day, to get my daughter and the groceries loaded, and I swear the manager almost tackled me, and told me, THESE CARTS cannot go outside!!!! I was supposed to TRANSFER (??) my groceries and kid to a regular cart, and then proceed out to the parking lot. Whatever!!!!! Just remember, all those perfect ladies probably have more than a few issues of their own. Ignore them, and keep on rollin' (no grocery cart pun intended!)
I lose it in public about once a month. It embarrasses the hell out of my kids, but so what. I feel better.
Most of the time I feel like I'm being pecked to death by a pesky bird and I just blow. My everyday life is just one irritation after another.
Hope you feel better and didn't hurt your toe kicking the cart. They didn't have those, thankfully, when my kids were little, but the two seaters were bad enough--I could not for the life of me steer them around the store.
I refuse to use those carts. And I also fail to see why they would make carts supposedly to help we moms out when we can only fit through the handicapped aisle; after all, we aren't handicapped, unless you count going grocery shopping with a sick child a handicapp, which I certainly do. That said, I want a damned sticker for my car, too. The saddest or funniest thing about this post? you are SO nicer than I am!
You're not alone. I suffer from frequent meltdowns that occur Monday-Friday, precisely between the hours of 8-5. I am a nanny of three children, all of whom I am convinced the mother feeds lollipops and Coca-Cola shortly before my arrival.
Sorry you had to endure such classless snobs (is that an oxymoron?) while simply food shopping. To bleeeeep with them!
I despise those car carts! Who's bright idea was it to make those things so damn unsteerable? I feel your pain. After you fight for one of them (why do they only have like 3 for the entire store??) inevitably, your kid will get tired of riding it. And you're left with an empty car cart and all the other parents evil eyeing you because you had the nerve to take one when your kid didn't even want to ride it. I need a drink.
Oh man, girl. That was just one no bueno experience after another. I'm sorry. :(
And screw the Stepford bitches.
i feel that way EVERY outing I have with my kids. And those trucks are impossible to maneuver through the grocery store. You need to read Bluemilks post about a nasty look a woman gives a mom at the grocery store. She gets some nasty comments too about it. People are so judgemental and suckie. You don't need a parenting book. Those snooty beeyatches need a stick jammed up their ass (or removed from it.) You are a great mom to pick up your exhausted offspring after a long day. Who could snub you for that? Nobody worth their salt.
You're not psycho. It may sound absurd, but that afterschool pick-up to tennis/soccer/dance/where ever can be sooooooo chaotic and stressful. I couldn't tell you how many times I've chanted in my head, "I'll be nice to the boys no matter how loud, crazy or obnoxious they're being" on the way to pick-up. After 2 minutes in the car, I'm ready to open the door and push them out. PLUS, you had not only a 4 yr old with you, but a SICK 4 yr old that you carried! What a woman! I'm glad you kicked the cart. I hope you kicked it really hard. How rude of them! They should have been bending over backwards to help you. Shame on them!
Sometimes you just lose it, but's that's OK. I hope you have a great weekend!
I am snickering with you, not at you.
The grocery store is like the Triathalon of motherhood. If you can get through one with at least one screaming child, and leave with the same amount of hair attached to your head as you entered with, you get your mommy license.
I feel you, dude.
And I never ever took any crap from my boys when they were little, and that worked well until the hormones kicked in. It doesn't make a bit of difference now. :)
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