My last post was so full of peace and harmony. This one is full of frustration and stress. Why? Three words..Christmas in Jersey!
Today I experienced the reason the rest of the country makes fun of my fine state. My husband and I set out for our local Target armed with optimism and two adorable little letters to Santa.
What we experienced was enough for me to pay $500 for overnight shipping to get the rest of our gifts.
It's amazing what crowds, under staffing and a deadline will do to people. "Peace on Earth-Good Will to Men?" F-that!!! It's all about little Vinnie getting his Playstation and DON'T mess with little Vinnie (or his mom). Trust me, they will knock you on your ass if you even look at them the wrong way.
I was standing in the electronics section patiently (at least outwardly) waiting for someone to unlock a camera for me. They have a little button you can press for assistance. I had already pressed the button and a very harried "Target Team Member" assured me he would be right with me. Not thirty seconds later, little Vinnie (sucking on a Slushee and chowing on a soft pretzel) and his tough cookie mom came up next to me. He proceeded to hit the button-TWICE. A red light flashed and the speaker loudly proclaimed, "A TARGET TEAM MEMBER WILL ASSIST YOU IN LESS THAN SIXTY SECONDS!!!"
Harried "Team Member" gave me the evil eye and told me "I SAID I'd be right with you!" I assured him that it was not me who hit the button. As he turned away little Vinnie hit the button AGAIN!!! The Target dude runs over to me to tell me to wait and once again I proclaimed my innocence! Finally a woman comes out to wait on Vinnie and his mom. Now I start getting the Jersey 'tude! That little devil child was NOT going jump ahead of me no matter how many times he banged on the button!
At this point I was seriously ready to bang my head against the glass case protecting all the Nintendo DS games. I mustered all my composure and informed the Target lady that I was the first person to hit the button so it was "MY FRICKIN' TURN!" (I put it much more politely than that, but trust me, I was ready to go postal.) Vinnie gave me a look that still makes my blood run cold. I half expected him to jump me in the parking lot and whack me with a tire iron.
We made it out alive and high tailed it home to our nice little house safe from Vinnie, his mom, and the frenzied shoppers of Jersey.
Tomorrow, the mall. I'll bring my tire iron.