10.27.2008

Sounds like someone has a "little problem"...


This morning I hit rock bottom. After I dropped the girls at school I went to the McDonald's Drive Thru to get my morning FOUNTAIN Diet Coke. (Cans or bottle just won't do!)

I placed my order and pulled up to the window. As I went to hand the girl my debit card she informed me, "The card machine doesn't work. CASH ONLY."

SHIT!

I frantically rummaged though my purse, and the little change holder on my dashboard. I was out of luck, all my pennies only added up to 47 cents.

I started to feel a little panicky, so I tried to reason with the lady. "I come here all the time. Can you give me the Diet Coke and I'll come back later with money?" God I sounded desperate.

"Sorry... NO" she replied, as she looked me straight in the eye and dumped my Diet Coke in the sink. I could tell she was enjoying the power she had over me.

I almost jumped through the window and grabbed the cup out of her hands. Luckily I came to my senses before things got ugly. I think she would have pummeled me pretty quickly had it come to fisticuffs. She looked like a gal who had been around the block a few times.

Thankfully, there's a Burger King across the street. I cruised on over to The King and got myself a big old super sized cup of carbonated caffeine. Their card machine was working and the transaction went off without a hitch.

Five minutes later I was cruising along chugging my liquid crack with a smile on my face.

I'm not proud of this story, and I know I have issues. I'm working on it, okay?!

Remember, realizing you have a problem is the first step toward recovery.


30 comments:

justme said...

so far today i have charged wendy's once, and manhattan bagel once....i need to get me some cash.

Anonymous said...

Jill, in our town is a little fast food restaurant that is like an institution. EVERYBODY loves it. (It's like a mom and pop Taco Bell) I worked there FOREVER. It seriously has the best food, everything is homemade, the tortilla chips are cut fresh everyday and fried, and everything else, too. The owner, Walt, is so picky that he has the soda fountains' ratios of syrup to carbonated water turned to make the sweetest, most flavorful soda ever. AND they used finely crushed ice. IT. IS. AWESOME. I go there at least 3xs a day for diet mt dew. Luckily they have refill mugs so it's only 75 cents. Or I'd be broke. The drinks are the best. You'd love it.

Dr Zibbs said...

You could have at least hurled a tennis ball at her.

Tara R. said...

You showed much more restraint than I would have. I would have crawled through that little sliding window and b!t¢hed slapped her.

Katie Ryan said...

You have lots of willpower. Be proud!

Anonymous said...

I had to go off caffeine cold turkey in September. Worst experience ever. They need a whole wing at Betty Ford for Caffein Rehab. Brutal.

Elizabeth said...

OK, this could be pgy hormones talking, but had that bitch pulled that shit on me, I'd have launched my beached whale sized ass right through that drive through window and beaten her with that now empty cup and then shoved her in a fryer.

I'm starting to think I have anger issues.

Anonymous said...

Compliments to you I am so proud of my little girl. I was afraid that you hurled the 47 cents at her.

High on Hairspray said...

You are much better than me. I would have had to say something!

preppyplayer said...

You are resourceful!

Petunia said...

I can't believe she poured your Diet Coke into the sink! You need to pull a Pretty Woman on her and go back....and , uh,....I don't know what--do something!!!

Paige said...

This could so happen to me, as I never have cash.

And what would have been so hard about giving you the damn diet coke?

People like that are really asking for a beating

Olivia: (mostly) Happy Homemaker said...

Oh, too funny!

That is SO something I would do!

Alexis Black said...

So funny! I grabbed Dan's debit card by mistake the other day and got to the drive-thru and was denied because I didn't know my PIN. I was SOOOOO mad. I was frantically pressing those buttons trying to come up with anything he may use as his PIN. Apparently, he really doesn't want me using that thing. I had to drive away in defeat!

Anonymous said...

As a fellow hard-core caffeine addict, I would've given you the Diet Coke, PLUS super-sized it for you.

I've found that McDonald's doesn't even have the best fountain sodas - they always taste faintly greasy or something to me. Give me Sheetz or Wawa for the perfect fountain Diet Coke!

Jen said...

Fountain drinks are the BEST!

Belle (from Life of a...) said...

It's such a shame when people like the Burger King girl decide to use their power for EVIL.

Anonymous said...

O M G I would have gone through the window, I swear I would have!

DO NOT MESS WITH MY FOUNTAIN DIET COKE! But I am more addicted to Sonic's Diet Coke, between their ice & their styrofoam cups...ahhhh, heaven I say! LOL

Vodka Mom said...

OMG That totally sounds like me! My kids are ALWAYS taking every goddam penny that I have, and usually the person says, "Your card won't work!!"

i am laughing so hard right now.

KK said...

I too am addicted to Fountain DC, specifically McDonald's Fountain DC, so I feel your pain, sister!

Sass said...

You're a better woman than I.

Once, I was having the ultimate craving for McD's fries and iced tea. I drove through, got to the window, and he tried to hand me a sprite and a hi-c.

I said...that's soooo not what I ordered. He rolled his eyes at me and said, "well, I guess I'll have to cancel all this and start over."

I was having a realllllly bad day, so I looked at him, immediately started crying, and drove away.

Yeah.

I'm a bad ass.

Unknown said...

LMAO! that's just to funny...I wonder if there is some kinda 12 step program? NOT that you need any 12 stepper....I'm just sayin...
:-)

Yellow Beads said...

UGH, that is wrong--they could have helped you out this one time. I can't believe she threw that damn coke away!!

Kat said...

They definitely should have had a sign up on the drive thru for heavens sake! Sheesh!

I never carry cash anymore. Crazy!

Linda S said...

YOU don't have issues...SHE on the other hand...WWRD, What Would Ronald Do? Very sad day to be a clown...

K and/or K said...

BK DC is not the same, poor girl. Not poor as in insulting your financs but as in empathsizing with your crisis!

The Chic Chauffeur said...

ok. That soda cost mcdonald's maybe a nickel. the cup cost more than the darn soda. that snotty clerk should have just given you the soda. Talk about missing an opportunity to cement your customer base! That's why that chick is making minimum. :)

Sorry, I need a cuppa joe myself!

Leslie said...

I feel your pain! I absolutely have to have a real coke from mcdonalds all the time. It is like an addiction. I have figured out which McDonalds serves a large coke in a styrofoam cup because that makes it taste better. The paper cups just don't keep the cokes cold enough! I am not sure what I would if I didn't have enough change in my car and the girl poured it out! Ugh!!

Tickled Pink And Green said...

In college my friends and I would get one of the few of us who had a car and all drive quite far away from campus (about 10 minutes) just to go to this place Jack & Jill (!) Donuts because they had the BEST fountain diet Dr. Peppers. I don't know why, but they were just better!

Oh the things we do for that certain "taste" from our caffeine beverages!

Jaina said...

Shouldn't she have told you that it was broken when you ordered? How rude was she?

 
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