5.27.2008

Why Can't I Be You?

Another week has flown by and Terrible Tuesday is upon us! I'm almost at the bottom of the seven deadly sins list...I've covered the top five sins I'm guilty of in order of relevance...vanity, sloth greed and wrath and gluttony. Next on the list...the green eyed monster!

I think envy is one of the most destructive of the seven deadly sins.
It eats away and people and makes them really mean. When I find myself not liking someone, I ask myself if I envy them in some way.

I did a little research on ENVY and came up with some pretty interesting information.

According to Wikipedia...

"Envy may be defined as an emotion that "occurs when a person lacks another’s superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it.

It can also derive from a sense of low self-esteem that results from an upward social comparison threatening a person's self image: another person has something that the envier considers to be important to have. If the other person is perceived to be similar to the envier, the aroused envy will be particularly intense, because it signals to the envier that it just as well could have been him or her who had the desired."

Amen to that . I see if everyday in my town that seems to run on keeping up with the Joneses. If Joe gets a Porshe, Jim needs to get a Porshe Turbo, whether he can afford it or not. So sad.


Betrand Russell, a famous philosopher and writer said that envy was is of the most potent causes of unhappiness. It is a universal and most unfortunate aspect of human nature because not only is the envious person rendered unhappy by his envy, but also wishes to inflict misfortune on others. PRETTY DAMN DESTRUCTIVE.

So when I find myself looking at someone else's vacation home, flawless skin, or undefeated tennis record and I feel the green eyed monster creeping up on me I remind myself that I am really lucky to have what I do and to be who I am.

Then I stand in front of the mirror, like Stuart Smiley from Saturday Night Live, and I say to myself...

"Hey, I might not look like Angelina Jolie, or have a backhand like Maria Sharapova...my home is not perfectly decorated, some of my friends have full time cleaning ladies and take trips to Europe over Spring Break. THOSE B-TCHES!!! Wait a minute...It's normal to have these feelings-I just need to love myself...I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me. I am a worthy human being with many strengths and some weaknesses...and...that's...okay."

Then I take a Valium, and I feel MUCH BETTER.

Hop on over to Lunanik's blog to check out her latest take on the Seven Deadlies. I PROMISE I won't be jealous if you do!

Next week...LUST (Mom and Dad-you should not read this one...I don't want to freak you out!)


17 comments:

Unknown said...

oooo I can't wait for lust!

Petite G. said...

I just love reading your posts. I'm pretty pissed though that I didn't thoroughly read through the deleted post better because now I'm all curious....See this is what happens when you start sharing your blog with family. You are open and yet you still can't be completely open. There is still a sense of censoring that must happen. And that sucks. I too, think about starting another blog just for the "real" me but then I would lose all my readers and that would suck more....I love you guys.

Come visit me again. You always have such nice things to say.

And oh yeah, get rid of that stupid letter verifier when you comment. I hate it!! I mean how many spam comments do you really get?? :)

GetSmartGal said...

You definitely don't have that green eyed monster on your back you sound perfectly sane and healthy to me. I loved Stuart Smiley, funny stuff thank you!!

Kate said...

I think of all the places I've lived - this "gotta have more" syndrome is the worst in NJ. I am amazed at how people try to outdo each other sometimes - and work a bazillion hours so they never really enjoy it themselves! Insane! Tough not to get sucked in though...

emersonsmama said...

That whole "keeping up with the Jones" mentality is part of what made us decide to leave Southern California. The lifestyle out there (at least in our little corner of suburbia) was all about buying what everyone else had whether you could afford it or not. I used to be regularly amazed when our Moms' Club met for playdates, etc. - families with husbands who were EMTs or firefighters with wives who were SAHMs were living in the exact same types of ginormous houses as the SAHMs in the club who were married to lawyers or engineers. The real estate bubble was keeping everyone afloat for the time being. One of my friends that I still keep up with from the Club (a photographer married to a lawyer who relocated to the East Coast a few months before we left too) said that when she went out recently to visit there were "For Sale" signs everywhere.

I'd like to say that we held ourselves above the fray... but we were caught up in it too. We spent our first two years out here recovering from all those unnecessary purchases and $300 dinners.

MarĂ­a said...

Can I have a valium?

LunaNik said...

Envy is totally destructive, isn't it?! I'm sure you see a ton of "Keeping up with the Jones'" syndrome where you are, but luckily I don't see that here. Unless of course, I want to envy the fact that my neighbor a block away gets to witness acutal murders instead of just boring ol' knife fights. ;)

Jaina said...

I think I'm slightly guilty of keeping up with the Joneses, but I try to not be. Definitely guilty of envy sometimes, not usually very serious, but still, bits here and there.

Anonymous said...

I think in our society it's hard not to play the Keeping up with the Joneses game. We're so concerned with materialism in our culture that sometimes it's difficult to remember that it's not important to collect stuff.

ConverseMomma said...

This is awesome and so true. It is hard not to compare ourselves and be jealous when someone has more, and seriously a cleaning lady?? But, even harder to admit it to ourselves and to others. You rock!

The Mrs. said...

Ooooh lusting for lust....I love your stewie smalley part!

sltbee69 said...

So, so true. Thankfully, keeping up with the Joneses isn't too bad in my little river town. However, it's been fun trying to teach my tween about it (NOT).

Christine said...

Sometimes I am tempted to not have my friends over when things aren't "perfect"- but then I figure- hey- it will make them like me more becasue I make them feel better about themselves when they see the imperfect life I'm living! Twisted- I know.

ShelbyAnne said...

Haha. Envy. I know, I've been slacking on my sins-chatter. Sorry. I'm looking forward to Lust...ooh!

Betsy, short for Elizabeth, formally known as Esther said...

Yup, pretty much sums it up.

suchsimplepleasures said...

i want to do lust. i wish that i had done some of these but you started this during my dark time!!!
i love reading these!
xo

Olivia: (mostly) Happy Homemaker said...

So true!

 
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