I love you just the way you are....

Today was Meg's 4th grade orientation at her Middle School. (4th-8th grades).

As we walked into the cafeteria, lots of girls came running up to us to say hello. I could tell they were really happy to see Meg. I wish she could have shown some enthusiasm when they greeted her, but she was really serious. I could see she was feeling anxious. It was really chaotic and loud in the room, and she HATES chaos.

Teacher assignments were handed out and I got to see which girls are in her class. Of course there is a "mean girl" in the mix. The same girl who hit Meg in the head with a jacket last year. I'll be keeping my eye on her this year. Unfortunately, it's almost impossible to avoid dealing with nasty kids. There's at least one in every class. Thankfully the teacher does not tolerate nonsense and is pretty in tune with any bullying that goes on in her classroom.

There are three girls in her class that she loves and that she's very close with. Despite the fact that they wanted to hang out with her she clung by my side like glue during the entire orientation. I tried my best to get her over with the gang, but to no avail.

That's the hard part of being a mom. She is going to deal with things in her own way. I can guide her, but I can't FORCE her to handle things the way I would like her to. I hoped she would play team sports, like soccer or softball, it was a no go. I'd like her to be a little more outgoing in a crowd, but I can't MAKE IT HAPPEN. She is who she is, which is a funny, smart, creative little girl, who does things at her own pace. I always give her the opportunity to try things, and then she decides what she wants to do.

She always surprises me, like last year when she was chosen out of the entire third grade to sing the solo at the Christmas Concert. I was impressed that she even auditioned, and floored when she had the nerve to get up in front of 500 people and sing her little heart out. Or when after years of encouragement she announced that she would be joining the swim team and the cheerleading squad.

As she enters Middle School I can offer her support and words of advice, but she will have to handle things in her own way. Thus far it's served her well. She usually makes very good choices. Choices that are right for her. I know I'm in for a bumpy ride. Middle school is a tough place. I want to help make it as positive for her as humanly possible.

Tomorrow, Catherine has her kindergarten orientation. I'm not worried about her being shy. Quite the opposite. I do wonder how she's going to handle school five days a week from 8:40 until 3:05. But that's a whole 'nother post.

So here I am, with two kids starting new schools in less than a week, I'm sure I'll be reaching out to you all for input and advice. We're all heading into a whole new world. Wish us luck.


Anonymous said...

I love those girls !!!!!!!!!!

P said...

Boy, have I learned that lesson ... over and over again. Each kid is different and they are the way they are. I wish we could change some things, make a little tweak here and there, but it is what it is.

Mrs.D said...

sounds like things are going to be getting increasingly dramatic around your home for the next several years with middle school on the horizon. hold on to your hat!

Brie said...

I struggle with the same issues. You want to guide them in the right direction but if you push too much it backfires! You have the right attitude :)

Lane Boyz Mom said...

Wow, middle school is 4th thru 8th? UGH, you had to stress much sooner than me, lol Our is 7th & 8th grades, so I had to start stressing this year.

I know EXACTLY what your talking about, wanting her to join stuff, sports....same thing with my son, but nope. He did try out for football, but didn't make the team, but he refuses really to do anything else. I think he's just overwhelmed.

Randi said...

Sounds like she has a great support system.

keep the lines of communication open, it will help to always have someone to talk to. She'll do great.

Shelby said...

Whoa, what KINDERGARTEN goes all day?! I don't think mine did, but then, I don't really remember.

Middle school IS rough (although for me it was 6th-8th) and probably the worst time of my life. I can't count the number of times I told my mom I hated her and she was ruining my life. You've got a ways to go yet, but it sounds like you're doing a great job being encouraging but not forceful. =)


Wow, middle school starts so early for your girls!
I hope school goes well for both of them.
I think it's good that you support her instead of pushing her to do something she's not comfortable with.

Somewhere Between Pinot and Pacifiers said...

My DD is not really shy, but she does like structure, so I can see her acting like your oldest when she gets to that age. Isn't it funny how siblings can be so different and how they change over the years?

Anonymous said...

They are going to be two very tired little girls next week.

My son started kindergarten yesterday and he was like a zombie last night.
Good luck with it!

Jo said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog.

My own children are very different in nature. I appreciate them both for their different views, likes and dislikes. My son is in his first year of college and my daughter just began her junior year. I've so enjoyed watching them evolve into who they are now and wonder who they will become.


KHE said...

I have the same ages--kindergarten and 4th! This is a whole new chapter in my book. School age kids!!!

Tammy said...

Good luck with Middle School. My daughter will start next week as well, however it is 6th-8th grades. I think I am more nervous than she is.
Your daughters sound a lot like mine. The older one is a bit more shy and the younger one outgoing.

Impoverished Preppy said...

Good luck with your school year!

I can't believe that they throw innocent little fourth and fifth graders in with seventh and eighth graders - egad.

A Buns Life said...

I can't believe you all get to start SO late!! We have been in school since August 13th!! When do you all get out?

Are you going to be sad or happy when Catherine is officially in kindergarten? I'm a little bit thankful Olivia missed the cut-off by two weeks....I have two more years with her before she starts.

Kel said...

I too have those moments with my daughter where I would like to tell her how to handle a situation, but can only offer advise - they are their own little person and eventually they will grow up and have to do it by themselves, without momma. It's tough and exciting all at the same time watching them grow and change.

I hope your daughter has a wonderful school year! Thanks for stopping by my blog, I really enjoy meeting new people, your blog is cool...I really like the tennis and coffee thing, very unique!

Have a wonderful weekend!

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