Getting "Down and Dirty" with Petunia!

Okay, returning to your questions. Petunia really went for it! I love forthright people.

You go Petunia!

Petunia said...What is the most embarrassing thing you've ever done?

Wow, it would be hard to pick! I've done so many incredibly humiliating things. (Most of them when I was drunk.) The most recent was when I puked all over my friend's master bedroom at a Preakness party two years ago. That was really lovely. I looked so cute in my Lilly Pants and Jack Rogers sandals lying on her white matelasse comforter in my own vomit. Word of warning...Black Eyed Susans on an empty stomach can be deadly. You have been warned!!!

Luckily the host and hostess of the party are the kind of people who like those kinds of things to happen. (Heavy duty partiers! I can only hang out with them a couple times a year.)

I passed out in the bushes outside a Denny's when I was in college. But that really wasn't too embarrassing because I was out of town so no one knew me.

Right before I met my husband I went on the worst blind date EVER! My sister and her husband fixed me up with the biggest geek in the world, so what did I do? I got smashed. We ended up at a Progressive Dinner party in my sister's neighborhood where I proceeded to flirt heavily with all the cute married guys at the party. I had no choice! Everyone was married and my date was the biggest goober ever! But seriously, I was really humiliated the next day. I'm surprised none of the wives clawed my eyes out. It was 14 years ago, and I still feel a little embarrassed when I go visit my sister!!

Have you always been happily married?

Up until I was 33 I wasn't married at all!! Just call me an old maid. But seriously, I didn't feel a huge drive to get married in my twenties. I had some serious boyfriends and I lived with one of them when I was 25, but he wasn't the right guy.

I always knew I wanted to have children, but getting married, having a big wedding with a poufy gown and all the bridesmaids, well, it was never really my big dream! We did have a nice wedding in Vermont, and it was a blast. I thought I would have been just as happy to go to Vegas, but in hindsight, I'm so glad we went through the trouble. There is something to be said for saying our vows in front of the people who mean the most to us in this world.

As for being "happily married." I am very happy to be married. I love my husband very much. Some days it's great, other days he really pisses me off and gets on my nerves. (and visa versa) Unless something monumental happens, (such as Jon Hamm from "Mad Men" proposing to me) I plan on spending the rest of my life with Brad.

With names like Jill and Brad, don't you think we were made for each other?


This ends today's Q and A session. As always, I am always here to answer your queries and/or give advice. I so love giving advice, so if there's any major decisions or issues you need help with, feel free to ask me, a total stranger, for my guidance. I'm here for you, 24/7 thanks to my cool BlackBerry.

And please don't be frightened by all my drunken stories. I've replaced beer and jello shots with Diet Coke Big Gulps and Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffees, so my brain works at a very high rate of speed.