Full contact tennis

I haven't written a good tennis post in awhile, but something somewhat exciting actually happened today, so I thought I'd share.

I like my tennis like I like my men, fast and hard. (Ha ha...just kidding Mom.) But seriously, I like a lively game of doubles, and today was no exception.

I was playing with a group of friends and we were having a jolly good time smashing overheads, rushing the net, and going for the gusto...it was all fun and games, until someone got hurt.

Unfortunately, that person was one of the nicest, most beloved people at the tennis club, and I was the one who hurt her.

Just shoot me.

It all happened so quickly, I hit a driving forehand from the baseline when my dear friend stormed the net, the next thing I know, my ball SLAMMED into her eye, she yelped in pain and hit the ground. I was scared.

I ran to get help and an ice pack. When I returned to the court I got my first look at the damage.

It wasn't pretty.

She had a shiner that would put Mike Tyson to shame and broken blood vessels in her eye that looked very, VERY, painful.

I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I nursed her wound, and brought her a cookie and offered to drive her to the doctor. She refused my offer and went on her own.

Luckily her eye is okay. No scratched cornea, no detached retina, a bit of concern ABOUT THE BLEEDING, so she will return to the doctor tomorrow morning for a follow up.

This kind of stuff happens in the dog eat dog world of housewife afternoon tennis. I know that. Next time, it could be me, face down on the court, crying in pain. I accept the risks, and I will return to the courts this Thursday, ready to face the dangers that await me.

I leave you with a sports prayer...

God, let me play well but fairly.
Help me to learn something that matters
once the game is over.
Let competition make me strong but never hostile.
Always let me help my opponent up.
Never catch me rejoicing in the adversity of others.
If I know victory, allow me to be happy; if I am denied, keep me from envy.
Remind me that sports are just games.
If through athletics I set an example,
let it be a good one.

And please Lord, let my friend forgive me for bashing her in her eyeball and making her bleed.

Amen.

Exhaustion Equation

4 overnight guests for 3 nights plus 2 hours of intense singles equals one very tired blogger.

I'll be back as soon as I get my life back together.

Miss you!

Don't you wish you were me?

My day today..


Go to the Jersey DMV to renew my driver's license which expired in OCTOBER!! I just realized this over the weekend. DUH!

Take all our newspapers, cardboard, bottles, cans and plastic to recycling

Clean the cat's litter box thoroughly

Clean our fish tank which STINKS!

Pay some bills

Drag the Christmas tree which is now a complete fire hazard out to the curb

(Along with the usual laundry, homework assistance, dog waste maintenance in the backyard...yes, I live a very glamorous life...)

Are you bored yet? I know I am!

Because I HAVE TO question everything I do....

Do you ever think what your life would be like if you took all the time you spend blogging, Twittering and Facebooking and did something PRODUCTIVE?

I do.

We all get 24 hours in a day, and those hours are precious. So why do I choose to sit staring at my laptop or BlackBerry when I could be cooking gourmet meals for my family, or running, or decorating the house?

Maybe I could work at a soup kitchen or plant 500 daffodil bulbs in my backyard. I could learn how to paint watercolors, or even, dare I say...get a job. The possibilities are endless.

Sometimes I think I should log my time spent at wasteful computer related activities. Maybe that would bitch slap me into reality.

What do you think?

Should we all do it? Can we admit publicly the time we "waste" on our dirty little habit?

What do you think about undertaking a computer logging experiment? We could log the time we spend glancing at our BlackBerrys, or sitting on our butts blogging or Facebooking and then choose kind of alternative that might make our lives better.

Then we could all report on our progress.

Yeah, I know, that idea kind of sucks....

Or does it?

Goodbye Michael

I haven't commented on the death of Michael Jackson, but I got a chance to watch some of his memorial service today, and I was really touched.

It was sad to see such a mix of genius and sadness. I was particularly struck by Brooke Shields' tribute and Jermaine Jackson's rendition of the song "Smile."

Of course, the most heartbreaking moment was when Michael's daughter Paris expressed her love for her father.

He was indeed an strange man, but his music was awesome and a huge part of my life when I was growing up.

I hope he has found the peace and happiness eluded him in his life.

Goodbye Michael

What a difference a year makes...

Another USTA team tennis season has come and gone. As you recall, the last couple of years I had a TYRANT for a captain. I had an undefeated record, but she was still incredibly nasty to me.

She was an unsportsmanlike bully and I'm really surprised casting didn't snag her for "The Real Housewives of NJ."

This year, I chose to play under the leadership of the most, polite, adorable sweet woman. My record this year was NOT very good, but I had so much fun.

Here is her letter to the team after a really enjoyable, drama-free season.

Hi everyone,

Congratulations to everyone for a great season! This was our first year back together (with some very special new additions) and we had a winning season!

We had so many fun, competitive matches and we always showed our team spirit by staying to cheer our team mates on even when our matches were finished. Winning is always fun, but it's how we handle the losses and what we choose to do moving forward that means so much more. I am really looking forward to working hard and trying to improve my game for next year's season. I really loved being your captain and I am looking forward to celebrating with all of you.

On behalf of our team, I would also like to say a HUGE thanks to Bob! You are a great coach and are always inspiring us to do our best.

We look forward to the fall season and our clinics with you.

Love,

Eileen

What a breath of fresh air!

Given the choice of an undefeated season under the leadership of a mean bitch, or a horrible record with a classy kind captain...I'll take the latter.

"You do not lead by hitting people over the head - that's assault, not leadership."

-Dwight D. Eisenhower

A Missed Opportunity

Hey! That's what I do when I'm on the potty...
<

As I've mentioned before. I joined "Freecycle" in hopes of snagging myself a treasure.

(Such as an antique armoire, or an Apple Laptop.) Thus far, I have not been successful.

Today, however, a real gem came in:

Offer:

Toddler potty. It could use a good scrub. It was handy for park and beach trips. The seat if broken, but I believe it can be replaced.

You've got to be kidding me? I can have a dirty, feces encrusted potty, with a broken seat...FOR FREE???!!! I was elated.

But guess what? Of all the dumb luck. Someone else claimed it before I had a chance.

Life can be so unfair.

Perspective

I am quite aware that I can be obsessive. Over the WRONG things. And I'm hoping to learn from it. As I sat at my laptop stressing out over total crap, I decided to hop on over to The NieNie Dialogues. I always keep the link on my sidebar. It's been awhile since I've read her blog and I realize that I need to go there each and every day.

What an absolutely incredible person. If you don't know who NieNie is, here's a brief description from her profile:

Stephanie Aurora Clark Nielson returns from a almost fatal plane crash. Happy to be blogging again from Utah and recovering too. Four happy children and one sweet husband make her life as good as it gets.

I can't even begin to describe how inspiring and amazing she is. She makes blogging, and life a true art form.

If you haven't been to her blog, hop on over.

And prepare to be in awe.

I did the best I could...

My dreaded tennis match is over. I didn't get lucky. My opponent had two very good hands. She wasn't grossly overweight and it appears she had 20/20 vision. She was in perfect health. All that and she was an amazing tennis player to boot.

To say I was intimidated would be an understatement. But I held it together and gave her quite a battle. I made her earn every point and I played the best tennis of my life.

In the end, I was defeated 6-4, 3-6, 2-6.

I can't be to hard on myself because I fought as hard as I could from start to finish.

She was just better than me.

Do I think back and wonder why I didn't hit more shots to her forehand or rush net a little more? Sure I do. But I'm still proud of myself. If I were one of my own mom I'd take me out for ice cream and pat myself on the back for a job well done.

After all, it's not whether you win or lose...it's how you play the game.

Isn't that what all the losers say? ;)

Taking a time out from the chaos.

Holy hell. It's been an exhausting couple of weeks.


I sit here surrounded by a mess of a house absolutely LOVING getting back to my blog.





Here are some things I've learned this week.

1. Penguins sometimes mate in the "missionary position" beak to beak. It's quite romantic.

2. Working on fundraisers is for the very wealthy or super organized. Those of us who are neither will have everything in their home in complete disarray during the period in which their lives are dedicated to procuring donations, cataloging them and making up pretty baskets. So don't be thinking you're so cool Jill Zarin. Try running a fundraiser without a lackey doing all your laundry and cleaning your toilets. I DOUBLE DOG DARE you!!!

3. Wicker and/or rattan furniture is expensive as hell. So are nice cushions.

4. When you let the cleaning lady you've had for 8 years go, she will be VERY sad. And so will you.

5. It's amazing the difference having a nice USTA team tennis captain makes. No stress, no tension, no mind games, no gossip. Weird. In a good way.

Okay, that's all I've got. I can't write about "The Real Housewives of NYC Reunion" OR the premiere of "The Real Housewives on NJ."

Why?

Because I fell sound asleep last night after eating my birthday cake. Getting older has that effect on me.

Critical Mass

My skin has reached the Michael Jackson Vitiligo stage, my hair is a stringy mess of layers and my house looks like an episode of Oprah where she humiliates people who's lives have gotten out of control.

Today is the day to change all that. I have a hair appointment at 10, my cleaning lady arrives at noon, and a spray tan at 2.

After I put a band aid on this mess, I will proceed to get to the nitty gritty of purging old winter clothes, paying bills and filing all the important documents lying in piles around the kitchen.

It's a tough job, but someone's got to do it.

I seriously think I have to let myself go. Keeping up the hair, working out, all that shit. Too time consuming. Waste of time. If I could just let go of the VANITY!!!

Gotta go. Time to clean up the mess that is currently my life.

Tennis Tuesday - The Art of Doubles

This post isn't just about tennis...it's about life AND tennis.

It seems in the world of tennis, there are people who prefer singles and those who prefer doubles. I've always loved both, but lately I seem to be leaning towards singles.

Why? Well, it seems that finding the right partner is like finding the right husband or friend. In order for it to work, there are so many variables.

Personally, I like to talk to my doubles partner. I like to work strategy and I'm open to suggestions. (As long as they are constructive.)

Some people hate this style. They don't want to talk, or they see talking strategy as criticism. Some people like to blame their partner when they lose. Nothing turns me off more than hearing one doubles player publicly bash their partner when they lose. I think it's really bad form. Even if your partner DID royally screw up, you're a team, you win as a team and lose as a team. Which makes singles so much simpler. It's all on you. If you play well you can pat yourself on the back, if you screw up, you didn't let a partner down.

There are a few people who I absolutely love playing doubles with. We have complimentary styles, and we like each other, so we feel comfortable talking, or communicating to each other during and between points. (Which occasionally means shouting out "Let it bounce!" or "MINE!!") We can laugh together if we screw up and we don't blame each other if someone is having an off day.

In tennis, as in life, chemistry means so much.

My favorite book on the subject of doubles is "The Art of Doubles" by Pat Blaskower. This is my doubles bible, it covers everything you need to improve your game, including, choosing the right partner, proper court position and achieving mental toughness.

Here's a line from the book that applies not just to tennis, but to any close relationship..."Picking the right person to share your tennis life is no small matter....Your own version of 'the dream team' should take into consideration not only your strengths and weaknesses as a player, but your ability to compliment a potential partner's expertise."

Who knew tennis could be so deep!???

Searching for Sea Glass

This morning, after I dropped my daughters off at school I decided to take a walk on the beach. A friend of mine collects sea glass, so I thought I'd try to find some for her.

As I walked along, searching for that elusive piece of colorful glass I found so many other wonderful things. I saw dogs running along the shore and solitary fisherman casting out their lines. I found perfect shells in all sorts of colors and stones that look like little jewels.

I thought about how my search for the sea glass is sort of a metaphor for my life. When I was young I had pretty big dreams. I pictured myself working for Saturday Night Live or David Letterman. As I worked in New York and pursued my grandiose goals, (which about a million other people aspired to) other opportunities and experiences came my way. I met so many talented people and had lots of good and bad times.

Did I ever get a job working for Letterman? I think you know the answer. But I did end up in a great place, blessed with so many treasures worth far more than I ever dreamed.

I never did find the sea glass I went searching for. But I did have a peaceful walk on the beach and I brought home some beautiful shells for my daughters.

The next time I go I'll bring them with me, so we can walk along the shore and look for sea glass together.

"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."

-John Lennon