Beach Bound

As you might recall, a few months back my husband and I had a wild night in the "City of Brotherly Love" with my high school friends and their husbands. A great deal of tequila was consumed and my evening ended with my head in a sombrero puking my guts up.

Good times.

Tomorrow night, the ladies go solo at the shore.

I pray I survive.

I am charging my camera and I'll be sure to post photos of the big outing. Hopefully they will just be cute shots of a bunch of middle aged ladies sitting at a table smiling and not incriminating and humiliating images of me laying face down on a bathroom floor.

I CAN tell you that many of you have told me in no uncertain terms that my blog is getting really boring, and I intend to jazz it up.

You might be wondering what Kate Gosselin in a bikini has to do with my girl's weekend. I'll tell you what it has to do with it...My hostess for the weekend is very intrigued by the whole Jon and Kate saga and she pointed out something unusual about this photo.

In an effort to spice up my blog, I'm going to throw this out to you.

Do you notice anything strange in this photo???

I'll tell you when I get back from my mini Spring Break.

TTFN.

Footnote: Thank you Mrs. K...here is a profile shot you mentioned in your comment.

My new love...

Say hello to my little friend...the Wii Active Personal Trainer!!

So cool.

If you haven't seen it yet you have to check it out!

It have workouts consisting of strength exercises with resistance, cardio, and sports drills.

You can pick a personal trainer to work with and set up a 30 day challenge to get in shape.

I love it, and so does Brad. I only wish I had started the workouts sooner, like BEFORE team tennis started.

If I keep up with this I will be an ANIMAL next season.

The tennis ladies of NJ should be afraid...very, very afraid.


Insert evil, maniacal laugh here....

Perspective

I am quite aware that I can be obsessive. Over the WRONG things. And I'm hoping to learn from it. As I sat at my laptop stressing out over total crap, I decided to hop on over to The NieNie Dialogues. I always keep the link on my sidebar. It's been awhile since I've read her blog and I realize that I need to go there each and every day.

What an absolutely incredible person. If you don't know who NieNie is, here's a brief description from her profile:

Stephanie Aurora Clark Nielson returns from a almost fatal plane crash. Happy to be blogging again from Utah and recovering too. Four happy children and one sweet husband make her life as good as it gets.

I can't even begin to describe how inspiring and amazing she is. She makes blogging, and life a true art form.

If you haven't been to her blog, hop on over.

And prepare to be in awe.

LOSER!!!

I lost another tennis match today. That makes all four of my singles matches this season. It was close, but I lost. And not because she was better than me. It's because I'm getting a loser complex and I didn't start going for it until well into the second set.

I'm a pathetic chicken.

Okay, I know, that's no way to think. Time to look on the bright side, yet again.

“What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise” -Oscar Wilde

“Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” -Arnold Schwarzegegger

“Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength.” Anonymous

“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.” - Mary Anne Radmacher

“Defeat is not the worst of failures. Not to have tried is the true failure.” - George E. Woodberry

I'm not going to lie. I'm really bummed, and I feel like I'm letting my team down.

My only saving grace is that I'm one of the only people on the team who agreed to play singles. Most people are afraid of singles, because it's hard, physically and emotionally. You're all alone out there and there is a ton of pressure. I'm not going to give up. Although I kind of want to.

Losing sucks.

I like to live dangerously!

My husband is very anxious since I posted a photo of the woman who beat me at tennis yesterday.

He has a vision of someone coming across my blog and calling her to inform her that the woman she played against (me) is a weirdo tennis stalker.

He envisions her coming to our house and demanding that I remove my blog post and get a life.

He then pictures me telling her to calm the hell down and punching her in the face. The end of his fantasy involves us coming to fisticuffs and wrestling around the yard in our short little tennis skirts while he watches.

Did I mention my husband is a perv??

Not again!!!

Okay, so I had another tennis match today. And I'll cut to the chase...I lost, AGAIN.

3-6, 6-4, 3-6. And I played even better than last week. I'm getting so much better. Why? Because I'm playing people who are so much damn better and more experienced that me!!!

This is who I lost to this week.












Seriously...she was "Mrs. Globe." Just picture her in a skimpy white tennis outfit, smashing a yellow ball at your face. Then you'll know what my morning was like. I probably could have won if the glare off her tiara wasn't so BLINDING!!

Oh well. Maybe next week I can lose to Miss Universe.

I need a martini. And some breast implants.

The moment you've been waiting for...

NOT MY BUTT...<<


My last post really created a buzz in the blog world! 5 whole comments.

I must say, Zibbs came up with the most creative guess, I've NEVER heard of a "Crisco Disco", but that was not the answer I was looking for.

Anonymous actually came the closest. (Give yourself a big hand anonymous!)

If you call someone "Crisco" you are essentially calling them a tub of lard.

Here's one of the definitions from Urban Dictionary...

Crisco is a lard substitute that can be found in a large can, and it is also a term used to describe a woman with a large booty.

Although not immediately apparent, they can both be described as "fat in the can".

You: "How you doin', Crisco?"
Her: "Why you callin' me Crisco?"
You: "Cuz you fat in the can!"

My daughter's friend learned it from her mother, who is one of my friends and grew up in a big family on Staten Island. Her older brother always addressed her as "Crisco." (Damn, kids can be cruel!!! I guess what doesn't kill you makes you stronger and gives you character and a quick wit. ) My daughter and her friends do not actually use this term. Unlike their mothers, my daughter and her best friend are sweet as can be. (Although they do think it's pretty funny.)

So there you have it. I'll bet you'll never look at a can of Crisco without thinking of me.

That makes me very happy.