"One Pound at a Time"

Did anyone catch Valerie Bertinelli today on Oprah? She has lost 40 pounds and looks fabulous! It's hard to believe she's 47. She looks very natural. One benefit of having a healthy build is that it helps disguise wrinkles. Once you get too thin the wrinkles really stand out. (I'll remember that tonight when I'm chowing down on Ben & Jerry's!)

It was a really interesting show. She really dished the dirt about her marriage to Eddie Van Halen and her fling with Steven Spielberg. Pretty juicy stuff!

I loved "One Day at a Time," but I was only allowed to watch it when my Dad wasn't around because he HATED the Ann Romano character played by Bonnie Franklin. He couldn't even look at her, so we had to sneak to watch it!

I looked up "One Day at a Time" on Wikipedia and here are some of the controversial plots the show covered: (This will be a trip down memory lane for the 40 plus crowd!)

• Suicide: In a two-part episode, Barbara freaks out when a new girl at school begins hanging around her incessantly. When Barbara shuns the girl she attempts suicide by drug overdose. Though she survives, it is revealed her problems go much deeper, owing to, among other things, a neglectful mother.
• Birth Control: When Ann confronts Barbara about "the pill" (Ann is informed of the situation by Julie), Barbara says that she's not on the pill, but just wanted guys to think she was. Ann replied "If they think you are, you'd better be."
• Relationships/Pre-Marital Sex: In another two-parter, Ann is mortified when she learns that Julie is romantically involved with a man more than twice her age. When the man brings Julie home very late one night Ann berates him. But when Julie gets in Ann's face ("You lonely, Ma?? You want him??"), Ann angrily slaps Julie. (the slap loudly hit full force
• In another episode dealing with pre-marital sex, teenager Barbara wrestles with the question of losing her virginity. After much self examination, Barbara decides not to have intercourse.
• Sexual Harassment: Barbara decides to fight back against a teacher who makes a blatant pass at her. She later finds out the teacher made similar advances to a classmate. Initially the two decide to go against the teacher, but the classmate backs out at the last minute.
• In another episode, Schneider has reservations when asked to become a sperm donor

In hindsight, maybe my Dad's annoyance with Bonnie Franklin was only one of the reasons he didn't want us watching the show!

Anyway, I hope she can stick with her healthy eating. For a girl who looked like she had it all, she really went through some nasty stuff. The things she endured throughout her marriage make the plots on "One Day at a Time" look tame.

She looks very happy now. Yay for her!

Scrolling Sunday

Back in my early blogging days I did a little series of posts about toys from my childhood. The following is the story of one of my earliest childhood disappointments.

Brine Shrimp and Broken Dreams

Continuing on the theme "toys from my childhood," this next toy taught me a lesson about truth in advertising. I saw this ad and though "cool, I can have a whole family living in my fish tank!" I really believed I'd have a pretty Sea Monkey mom, a handsome Sea Monkey dad and some cute Sea Monkey kids that I could train, just like it said in the ad.

I was so excited when my package arrived. I set up the whole thing and waited for my Sea Monkeys to hatch. When they finally did, all I got were a bunch of wiggly white worms squirming around in the water. They looked like maggots! I was so disappointed, I took them out on the patio and left those poor Sea Monkeys to freeze to death. It wasn't their fault. They were victims of the clever folks who placed the ad implying I would have a fascinating new pet "family" not slimy little sea gnats. Here is the real scoop:

Sea Monkeys are not actually monkeys, but they do come from the sea and are real living things (contrary to popular belief and urban legend). To be specific, they are Artemia Salina (brine shrimp) which were thought of as mere fish food for many years until Harold von Braunhut - a man who is famous among toy enthusiasts for inventing X-Ray Spex - discovered these marvels of the sea. He saw their potential as a "pet" and developed a simple, three-step kit that allowed aspiring young marine biologists to raise their own brine shrimp in a container of water.

Thanks alot Harold...I hope you can live with yourself, living in the mansion you bought with money earned lying to poor unsuspecting 7 year olds. Shame on you Harold von Braunhut, you're a very, very bad man! And I'll bet those X-Ray Spex couldn't really see through things!




We should stick Harold in the ring with some Rock em Sock em Robots. Remember the awesome sound they would make when you so would knock your opponents block off?!

Do you remember these? If you're anywhere near forty I'm sure you do! They're called Klackers but also go by: Clackers, Klick-Klacks, Whackers, Ker-Knockers, Whack'os, Bangers, Poppers, Bonkers, Clack Clacks, K-Nokkers, Mini Poppers, Rockers, Super Clackers, Whak Kos, Quick Klacks, Quick Clacks, Quick Wacks, Zonkers, Popper Knockers, Crackers, Wackers, Knockers and various other names. (Like I'm going to let my kid play with a Knocker, Banger or Whacker!!!) If the perverted names aren't enough, how about giving your child two GLASS balls attached to nylon strings that you are supposed to bang together at a high rate of speed?!

Growing up in the seventies, my friends and I all had them Luckily the worst thing that happened to me was getting hit in the tooth HARD. I still remember the pain.

I didn't have brothers, but apparently there is a strong similarity between this toy and a South American hunting weapon called a bolo. Used in this capacity the Klacker was extremely effective as a weapon and many a young child was rushed to the emergency room after getting clocked by a flying Klacker.

The most common injury, however, were the eye injuries caused by the exploding shrapnel when these babies shattered.

So toss out those Klackers and get your kids some lead covered Polly Pockets...YAY!!!