I'd rather tangle with Freddie Krueger...

Than with these Krazy Glue packin' chicks!!!!

Women stick together against cheating lover

A sticky case of revenge unfolded last week in a Wisconsin motel after a woman discovered her husband was cheating and invited three other scorned lovers to settle the score -- with Krazy Glue.

The 36-year-old Lothario was carrying on with all of them before his wife figured it out and notified the others, according to a criminal complaint filed in Calumet County, Wis., in a town about 90 miles north of Milwaukee.

"We had a plan," one of the women, Therese Ziemann, 48, told an investigator, according to court records.

Ziemann lured the man to a Stockbridge hotel Thursday, promising a "rub down," the complaint says. He was blindfolded and tied to a bed. Then Ziemann text-messaged the other three women, including the man's wife, who joined her in the room.

One of them, Wendy Sewell, 44, reportedly asked, "Which one do you love more?"

After the victim was threatened with mace, punched in the face and taunted, the mischief moved south.

Ziemann glued a sensitive body part to his stomach, according to the complaint.

The women, including Michelle Belliveau, fled when the man started yelling. All were later charged with false imprisonment. Ziemann also faces charges of fourth-degree sexual assault and misdemeanor battery. The wife was not named to protect the man's identity.

The man was treated and released at a hospital, said Calumet County District Atty. Kenneth Kratz, who otherwise declined comment.

Okay, guys. Can you imagine being surrounded by these scorned women? Just look at them!! The one on the left probably had the same look on her face after she glued the dude's member to his stomach.

I'm not going to lie. I think this is funny as hell, and I'm showing it to my husband. Hey, nothing wrong with instilling a little fear.

As this story proves, "hell hath NO fury like a woman scorned."

Just ask Lorena Bobbitt.

Heartbreaking...

I'm sure by now you've heard the horrible story of the Maryland family of 5 who perished in a murder-suicide last week. Francis Billotti Wood, the childrens' mother was a fellow blogger.

I read her blog, and she was an wonderful person. I was so inspired by her positive outlook. She was an amazing mother and a thoughtful, intelligent woman. What a terrible loss.

The name of her blog is What Am I Supposed To Do Now? She had a charity that she supported on the page...

The BIG Sweep, a program of Volunteer Frederick, turns trash into cash for area nonprofits. Structured like a walk-a-thon, participants collect sponsorships on behalf of their organization, but instead of walking, they pick up trash from Frederick County roads, streams, and parks. Over the past seven years, BIG Sweep volunteers have cleaned up 115 tons of trash and recyclables, almost 3400 tires and many truckloads of bulk items while raising more than $270,000 for their organizations. Thank you for helping to make this year’s BIG Sweep the best yet!

If you have it in your heart, please donate to this worthy cause in memory of a fellow blogger.

In the news...

There are a couple of stories in the news this week that really fired me up.

The first is the family in Western Jersey who were outraged that a local Shop rite supermarket would not decorate a cake for their son, named Adolf Hitler Campbell. Apparently this isn't the first time the Shop rite refused to make a cake for their son. Last year they requested a swastika be placed on the cake as decoration.

The child's father is LIVID that the supermarket refused to do the cake. After all, "it's just a name. He's not going to do what Hitler did."

Come on buddy, don't bullshit us. You name your son Adolf Hitler, and your daughters JoyceLynn Aryan Nation and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie and you expect no one is going to be outraged. You're an asshole and a Nazi. 'Nuff said.

The second story is regarding New York State Governor David Patterson's new budget plan which includes a 15% obesity tax on non diet soft drinks. OBESITY TAX? WTF? Once again, the government is going a little too far with this one. Why stop at taxing soda? You might as well have daily weigh ins for the citizens of New York State. If you are over the healthy limit for your height, you have to give the state a dollar. Let's take it one step further, if you are underweight you pay an emaciation tax. A dollar a day until you get up to a healthy weight. Maybe an ugly tax. If you aren't deemed good looking enough, another dollar.

That should help solve the budget deficit. IDIOTS.

And finally, Caroline Kennedy is gunning for the Senate seat being vacated by Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Granted, she is from a great political family, she went to Harvard and has a law degree. But she is NOT experienced. She's a socialite and philanthropist, but she is not a politician. It's a nice idea to have another Kennedy in the Senate. But c'mon people...there are other people who deserve it far more than she does and who have years of experience working for the state of New York. If she gets handed the seat it's nepotism pure and simple.

In summary, Nazis, stupid taxes and preferential treatment annoy me. I know that they are all facts of life, but it doesn't make it right!!

What do YOU think?

Nothing says "I hate you" like a shoe to the face!!!

Did you see the footage of the Iraqi reporter throwing his shoes at President Bush? If you haven't Google it...it's hilarious. Bush is laughing while the guy wings his wing tips at his head.

It's classic holiday entertainment.

A Caffeine Court News Bulletin

Coffee Shrinks Women's Breasts, Enlarges Men's

dailystar.co.uk — Swedish scientists have caused a stir by suggesting women who drink more than three cups a day could see their bra size drop. Tests by cancer researchers found half of all women have a gene linking breast size to coffee intake. The reaction is the reverse for coffee-slurping blokes – it can make their “moobs" swell.

Do you mean to tell me that my husband's boobs are going to be bigger than mine? Say it ain't so!!!

Do you think Diet Coke has the same effect? I'm panicking here people.

MEAN MOMMY!!!

Here's an article from our local paper...

Woman faces $8G in fines for gerbils

MIDDLETOWN: A township woman charged with abandoning three gerbils and a hamster in a wooded area in the township is facing up to $8,000 in fines.

Wendy Fiolek, 38, was charged with animal abandonment and failure to provide sustenance and shelter to the creatures, which had been household pets, said Victor "Buddy" Amato, chief humane law enforcement officer for the Monmouth County Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals in Eatontown.

The charges, all disorderly persons offenses, are scheduled to be heard Oct. 8 in Municipal Court, according to the summonses issued on Wednesday.

The small rodents had been put in a cardboard box and left in the woods by Sleepy Hollow Road, Amato said.

"A youngster walking a dog heard them scratching, and that's how they were found," Amato said. A shipping invoice with Fiolek's address also was found inside the box.

When he first questioned her about the rodents, Fiolek said her daughter had previously owned gerbils, but they had been given to "a good home," Amato said.

She ultimately admitted leaving the animals in the box because her daughter didn't take care of them, he said.

I love that she tried to deny it at first and then cracked under the pressure of questioning!

It's better than what happened to our hamsters. The cat got one of them and the daschund got the other. Poor Hansel and Gretel. I still feel bad about it!

I'll bet that kid's in big trouble now! First she doesn't take care of her gerbils and now Mom has to pay an $8,000 fine. I think someone is grounded for life.

Friend update...

I forgot to mention this earlier, but my friend who's husband thought he lost his job as of Monday was granted a reprieve!

Barclays purchased a portion of Lehman Brothers including U.S banking, fixed income, equities, trading, investment baking and research divisions, so for the time being, he (and many other people) still has a job!

Great news for my buddy, but it's still scary. The economy is such a mess right now.

I will not be taking calls from reporters regarding this latest development.

FF9D7DCE-AE40-2579-3F6E-F719942FF63D

1.02.21

1.02.05

Hold on to your pennies!

Economy wise (and in many other ways) we live in some pretty scary times.

As you've probably heard, Lehman Brothers has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy.

This has hit families in my town pretty hard. A friend of mine called me this morning with her voice shaking. Her husband is out of a job with no severance and no salary. So are thousands of other Lehman employees.

Now they are all competing with each other for whatever jobs are available in their areas of expertise.

Imagine, having you or your husband's source of income cut off, with virtually no safety net.

Hearing my friend's voice really hit home for me. I realized that I really do have to be super careful with our money, at least for the time being.

Granted, losing a job isn't the worst thing that can happen to a person. It happened to me when I was 25 years old. My company lost a big account and they let the newest people go. I felt like the wind was knocked out of me, but my expenses were low, and it was easy to bounce back.

When you have 4 childen, a mortgage and tuition bills to pay, the stakes are pretty high. I feel for them, and I'm not foolish enough to think that it can't happen to my family.

I'm not sure if any of you have been through this. If you have, tell me what happened, and how did you get your life back on track?

On a happier note...

Have you heard about the New Jersey dolphins? 15-20 bottleneck dolphins have found their way into the river near my house. (About 2 miles from the ocean.) There's been alot of media coverage, my friend's husband even got interviewed on "The Today Show" while he was looking at the dolphins with his daughters.

It's so cool. We see them every day as we drive back and forth on the Oceanic Bridge. They are really beautiful. They look like they are having a great time...sometimes they leap out of the water like they're in a show at Sea World. I hope they can find their way back to the ocean before it gets cold again...

I absolutely love living near the beach, but this has made the summer all the more special for our family and all the families in our area.

As you can see, my Midol has kicked in and all is right with the world again...until next month.

Caffeine Court Newsflash

The Bronx Zoo Cable Car Ride "Skyfari" has malfuctioned, with an impending lightening storm!!!

Over 40 people were stranded for over 2 hours and rescuers had to go up on cranes to get them down.

Why do I mention this? Because I was on this ride on Father's Day, with my husband and 2 daughters...and let me tell you, those cars are WAY up high. 150 feet to be exact.

I would be sh-tting bricks, literally if this happened to me. Scary stuff.

Nice try losers...

Here's a sick little article to brighten your day! Only in New York folks....

Corpse Wheeled to Check-Cashing Store Leads to 2 Arrests

By BRUCE LAMBERT and CHRISTINE HAUSER

Published: January 9, 2008

Even for the once-notorious Hell’s Kitchen neighborhood, it may have been a first: Two men were arrested on Tuesday after pushing a corpse, seated in an office chair, along the sidewalk to a check-cashing store to cash the dead man’s Social Security check, the police said.

When Virgilio Cintron, 66, died at his apartment at 436 West 52nd Street recently, his roommate and a friend saw an opportunity to cash his $355 check, the police said.

They did not go about it the easy way, the police said, choosing a ruse that resembled the plot of “Weekend at Bernie’s,” a film about two young men who prop up their dead employer to pretend that he is alive.

“Hell’s Kitchen has a rich history,” said Paul J. Browne, a police spokesman, “but this is one for the books.”

There was no sign of foul play in Mr. Cintron’s death, he added.

The roommate, James P. O’Hare, and his friend, David J. Dalaia, both 65 and unemployed, placed Mr. Cintron’s body in the chair and wheeled it around the corner, south along Ninth Avenue on Tuesday afternoon, the police said. The men parked the chair with the corpse in front of Pay-O-Matic at 763 Ninth Avenue, a check-cashing business that Mr. Cintron had patronized.

They went inside to present the check, but a clerk said Mr. Cintron would have to cash it himself, and asked where he was, the police said.

“He is outside,” Mr. O’Hare said, indicating the body in the chair, according to Mr. Browne.

The two men started to bring the chair inside, but it was too late.

Their sidewalk procession had already attracted the stares of passers-by who were startled by the sight of the body flopping from side to side as the two men tried to prop it up, the police said. The late Mr. Cintron was dressed in a faded black T-shirt and blue-and-white sneakers. His pants were pulled up part of the way, and his midsection was covered by a jacket, the police said. While the two men were inside the check-cashing office, a small crowd had gathered around the chair. A detective, Travis Rapp, eating a late lunch at a nearby Empanada Mama saw the crowd and notified the Midtown North station house.

Police officers and an ambulance arrived as the two men were trying to maneuver the corpse and chair into the check-cashing office.

The two men were taken into custody and questioned. The police said they were considering charging them with check-cashing fraud.

Mr. Cintron’s body was taken to a hospital morgue. The medical examiner’s office said its preliminary assessment was that he had died of natural causes within the past 24 hours.

Al Baker contributed reporting.

New Jersey's Finest!

What better way to relieve tension than to let a
Hooters girl play with your Uzi!?

Hoboken disbands police SWAT unit in wake of racy photos

9:48 PM EST, November 16, 2007

HOBOKEN, N.J. - The police department's SWAT team has been disbanded, just days after officials learned of racy photos showing the unit's commander and other officers cavorting with waitresses from a Hooters restaurant in Alabama.

Bill Bergin, a former deputy chief with the Hoboken Fire Department who was named the city's civilian public safety director on Thursday, made the announcement shortly after he was sworn in to the post on Friday.

"The unit itself has been disbanded permanently," Bergin told The Jersey Journal of Jersey City for a story posted on its Web site Friday night. He said the SWAT team members would remain on the force and continue their normal police duties.

Bergin also ordered the SWAT team's commander, Lt. Angelo Andriani, to return from vacation and assigned him to desk duty.

Andriani is named in a federal discrimination lawsuit brought by five Latino officers, who claim he is a racist who coerced four of them to work on his house when they should have been on duty.

Andriani has denied the allegations.

The photos were taken last year on a return trip from Louisiana, where the Hoboken officers helped with the Hurricane Katrina relief effort.

They show the waitresses holding shotguns and other weapons belonging to officers under Andriani's command. Some of the plaintiffs in the lawsuit were among the officers present.

City Councilman Ruben Ramos Jr. on Friday called for an investigation by the city into the conduct of the officers during the trip.

Remember kids tequila, bimbos

and machine guns DO NOT MIX!

Do you think they expensed their
jello shots and condoms?