I love you, but I'm not "in love" with you...

As much as I hate to talk about it, I'm officially middle aged (if I live to 86). This is the time in life when people typically assess where they are, what they've accomplished and whether or not they've achieved their dreams. If they aren't happy with what they see and feel the result is...A FULL BLOWN MID-LIFE CRISIS.

Perhaps this is the cause of a trend in my town. It seems to be all the rage to seek a divorce due to boredom, not feeling in love anymore, or falling in love with someone else.

I don't live in other people's homes, so I don't know the circumstances that go on behind closed doors, but this trend seems to be reaching epidemic proportions.

Where I live, the person who dumps their spouse ends up in the small house. The person who got dumped gets to keep the big house. I call my neighborhood "the divorce neighborhood" because it seems all our new neighbors end up here after their marriages break up.

One woman who moved in about a year ago is giddy with joy after leaving her husband. "I'm a passionate person, " she tells us, "and I wasn't passionate about my marriage anymore. I've decided to get rid of anything in my life that gives me a headache." Hmmm.

Maybe I'm being too judgemental, but that sounds really harsh to me! They have 3 kids!

I can totally see leaving someone if they cheat on you, or beat you. But because you're bored?

I think we all get bored. I know I get on my husband's nerves lots of times, and sometimes my tennis stories get old. (Thanks to all of you for listening to them!) My husband talks about his work alot, and I have to remind him to change the subject, but am I going to leave him because of it?

And of course there's the sex thing. They say men are predisposed to cheat. It's in their genes to try to spread their seed wherever they can. "We're all animals after all!"

Sounds like a bunch of bull to me. We're predisposed to take a dump in the woods too, but we potty train our children so we can be civilized and do it on the toilet. You can't do that with a dog. We might be animals, but we are supposedly intelligent animals that are capable of reasoning and choosing between right and wrong.

Everyone (I think) longs for the excitement of new love, the first kiss, the flirting, going on fun dates, making out on the couch...okay, I'm getting carried away here. But I would never trade my husband in to go back to all that stuff. Am I saying we never make out on the couch anymore? Pretty much, yes. But we really SHOULD, I'm sure it would be fun. Too bad the laptop seems to get in the way of that these days! (Stay tuned for my husband's upcoming post, "My wife's blog ruined my sex life!")

Sometimes marriage is easier than others. Mine definitely goes through phases. Some days things are great and we're all happy as clams. Other times it can turn on a dime, and we CANT STAND each other. But we know it's cyclical, so we just wait for the good feelings to come back. And we don't bail.

Maybe the people living in my neighborhood couldn't get past the bad days. Who knows? I'm not going to ask them, but I can't help but feel bad when I see the sad looks on the faces of the ones living in the "big house", the one they all lived in together as a family, before it got BORING.