NaBloPoMo Filler Post

Since we're on the subject of diet, here are some foods my children love that I would not eat in a million years. Sliced cucumbers, raw tomato, watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew, raspberries, clementines and blueberries. I wish I could enjoy these foods, but I just don't like them!

I really need to find some healthy snacks for myself that I enjoy. I love edamame-but not everyday. I also force myself to eat a few bananas a week. (that sounds perverted!) Raw carrots are doable (perverted again!) -although I don't eat them very often. I really need to get out of the Slimfast, Kit Kat Bar, Diet Coke rut! After all-you are what your eat-and I'd rather be a nice fresh Jersey Tomato than a can of chemicals!

How about you fine folks? What's your poison? (Bad choice of words.)

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not.

~Mark Twain

Confucius say..."Little things mean alot!"

A few days ago I posted about "THE BUDGET" and how I've learned the hard way that small purchases here and there (a Webkinz on Monday, lip gloss on Tuesday, a bouquet of flowers Wednesday...) can add up in a big way! The same applies to lots of areas. Avoid laundry for a day, the next day you're standing knee deep in dirty socks and underwear. Let your kids stay up an hour late, they're cranky little buggers the next day. Do ya see where I'm headed here?

Another area in life where little things add up is diet. The above mentioned areas (money, housekeeping, consistency with kids) have always been a challenge for me. The past few years, however, my discipline in controlling my calorie intake has been a strong point for me. (Not healthy eating per se-just controlled portions!)

My best friend used to say to me, "The pleasure from eating a candy bar for thirty seconds cannot compare to the happiness that comes from being thin 24/7." (She's the Confucius of Jersey-who has lots of hilarious and sage words of wisdom.) Shallow, I know, but this statement resonates in my head every time I'm tempted to eat a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's.

The good news is, that in any area, if you practice discipline, there are moments when you can SPLURGE , guilt free. This morning was one of those moments. After I dropped Meg at school I high tailed it to my local Dunkin' Donuts and ordered me a large coffee LIGHT WITH CREAM and a Boston creme donut. (Can you say, sugar, fat and caffeine? Yeah baby!) I enjoyed every calorie laden bite-DELICIOUS! So here I sit, wired on sugar and caffeine, still basking in the afterglow of my gluttonous experience in the front seat of my mini-van. Soon my sugar high will end and I'll have to push myself on pure fortitude to do all the "little things" a mom has to do!

Maybe if I do some laundry, make all the beds and unload the dishwasher I can read some other peoples' blogs-GUILT FREE!

Patience is a virtue...

I just let my 4 year old daughter paint my nails with Cherry Red nail polish.

My hands look like the Manson Murder scene!

Just thought I'd share.

I'm exhausted...

Brad is away in Las Vegas for a Real Estate Conference and the schools in Jersey were closed Thursday and Friday. Needless to say, mommy's fried. We've had alot of fun the past few days, lots of friends over (each girl had a friend over today for FIVE, count 'em, FIVE hours!).

We saw "The Bee Movie" went to Barnes and Noble for hot chocolate and reading. We did hair wraps, had a dance party. (Let me tell you-when the music gets crankin' my daughters and I can rock the house!) We ordered pizza, popped popcorn and played Chutes and Ladders.

In between all the merry-making I ran around like a chicken cleaning up arts and craft supplies, loading and unloading the dishwasher, vacuuming up popcorn and dog hair...you know the drill!

Tonight 8 year old daughter and I worked on a big report she has due on Friday. Let me tell you, it brought back memories of working on school projects with my parents when I was overtired! Like pulling teeth. Oy. And this is just 3rd grade. I think middle school and high school will be the death of me.

Anyway-school's back in session tomorrow. I should go to bed now, I look and feel completely haggard, but I'm dying to check out the second episode of "Tell Me You Love Me" on HBO On Demand. I watched the first episode last week and I'm hooked! Great show! Too bad I can only watch it when my children are SOUND asleep. (My oldest daughter walked in on a pretty heavy duty sex scene when I attempted to watch the first episode before she went to bed. I was alerted to her presence when she walked up behind me and exclaimed, "Mom-I saw that guy's PENIS!" Oops-time to change the channel-FAST!)

I haven't even had a chance to watch Thursday's episode of "The Office" which I have recorded. I seriously don't think I have the energy to watch either one.

This NaBloPoMo thing is really screwing up my couch potato status. (Not to mention Cr8Buzz-THANKS CANDACE!) Good night peeps...

"Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward."

-Kurt Vonnegut

Gifts for the hard to shop for!

Here's a NaBloPoMo filler post if I ever saw one!!!  Notice my obsession with derrieres the past few days.  Why?  Only my shrink knows!

For people who hate rubbing that sweaty butt crack smell on their face!

The Original Butt Face Towel-at:
Merlin's Box.com

A wonderful gift for a gardener who loves asses!
(You can use your Butt Face Towel on him)
also from Merlin's Box.com
Mooning Garden Gnomes

The Obsessive Compulsive Action Figure (from Amazon.com)

The Obsessive Compulsive action figure stands 5 ¼" tall. Razor-neat, sterile-white, christened with a perpetually dismayed and mildly disgusted expression, the Obsessive Compulsive features a miniature surgical mask and a full-size hypoallergenic sanitary wipe that should be opened and used prior to removing the Obsessive Compulsive action figure from his packaging. Welcome to Hell. For the Obsessive Compulsive, the nightmare begins the minute he rises from his sparse, troubled sleep. The morning is a mixture of monstrous time-consuming rituals. He perceives an infuriating substandard level of cleanliness even in his own sealed and sanitized apartment, a fact that only seems to punctuate the germ-laden maelstrom of chaos located beyond the threshold of his front door. Very often he requires his surgical mask and gloves to move among the horrible masses. After years of practice, he hass become almost preternaturally adept at avoiding direct contact with others. He realizes, soon, that he will be rendered incapable of even leaving his apartment, and this knowledge brings an acid-tasting mixture of hope and hopelessness.

(And I'll bet he would love the Butt Face Towel!)

I have a little personal shopping business.

For a mere $50 per hour I can find little treasures such as these for the special people in your life!

Please call: 1-888-WHTTRSH

What the ???!!!

How in tarnation did I get on a mailing list for a butt flush?!

My fiancé and I used the program and our energy level was boosted IMMEDIATELY! It was a very pleasant experience. I expected bloating, gas and diarrhea, but instead we experienced pleasant bowel movements. Thank you for your product. We will definitely use it again in our future!" Nicole – Santa Barbara, CA

How romantic-she and her fiance butt flushed together! I think the bible frowns upon "pre-marital colon cleansing! I don't even want to hear the details of their "pleasant bowel movements!" "We will definitely use it again"-when? On your honeymoon? yuk

"It has changed my lifestyle for the better. I have lost 8 pounds and have more energy. It is a great product. There are many colon cleansing products on the market, but for me this is the best. Thank you Colopure!” Nick – Phoenix, AZ

He lost 8 pounds of WHAT? Did he have a side of beef stashed in his colon? This guy looks like he's sampled alot of colon cleansing products.

After the first week of using this product, my stomach got flatter, my energy increased, and I didn't have to pray everyday for what most people take for granted...Thank you so much!" Brent – Boston, MN

He was praying for something that a colon cleanser could offer?!

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Can we get personal?

I want to talk to you about something very personal. It's not sex or politics. It's much more intimate than that. Come closer...okay, here we go..I want to talk about money, or more specifically, budgets! Wait, get back here! I know how you feel. When people (aka my husband) try to talk budgets with me-I run for the hills. Those days are over.


For the past couple of years I've been responsible for paying the bills. One trampoline, many tennis lessons a few too many trips to Banana Republic and one very extensive home renovation later, I've been asked to resign my position as Family Accountant. In all seriousness-I'm freaked out about the whole thing. I like having control (I prefer driving to being a passenger, I try to lead when dancing...) BUT, if it makes our life better in the long run-I'm all for it!

As some of you may know-I am constantly trying (key word there) to improve myself. Cutting down on Diet Coke, passing up gossip magazines, cleaning out my closet (my god I'm like Mother Theresa!)

My next hurdle is becoming a more fiscally responsible person. Today-I did what my husband has been begging me to do for years. I did an Excel spreadsheet with a proposed budget. We are still in negotiations, but I am going to surrender my control for awhile and see how it works. I have to say, so far the process has been way less painful than I anticipated and my proposed weekly allowance is quite generous! I should have agreed to this years ago.

Happy Homemaker posted about her "Marriage Saving Budget". I was amazed! Reading her post was like reading about people on another planet! Incredible. I feel that I was drawn to that posting by a higher power. So, my friends, wish me luck on yet another endeavor to improve my life.

How about you ladies and gentlemen? Please share. Are you super organized and completely aware of where all your money is going? Or are you a fly by the seat of your pants kind of creature? (Like me!) Do tell! Don't be shy, according to Sitemeter only 60 people read this blog each day!

"We didn't actually overspend our budget. The allocation simply fell short of our expenditure."

-Keith Davis