Are you there God? It's me, Jill.

Dear Lord,

Please let the tropical storm predicted to hit coastal Jersey head out to sea.

You see, I have a birthday party scheduled for my 9 year old daughter and 20 of her closest friends at a local kids' dance club. The party starts at 5 pm, when the wind gusts should be hitting about 50 mph.

I've ordered the cake, stuffed the goody bags, my van is loaded with Hannah Montana plates and napkins, and my sweet little daughter is soooo excited. (But I guess you already know all that)

I don't ask for much. (Okay, maybe I do.) But this time, I'm pleading.

Cut me a break with this one, and I owe you one. BIG TIME!

Amen.

Update: 4:46 PM EST: I figured God might have alot on his plate, so I took matters into my own hands and rescheduled the party for Friday the 12th.

Now all I have to do is break the news to my daughter and call 20 girls! Yay me!

An important political question...

What kind of lipstick was Sarah Palin wearing last night? It was such a pretty color, and it really had staying power.

I can't believe CNN and Fox News have yet to address this important issue.

The voters need to know!

5 words I hate...

I've been tagged. "Name 5 words you hate. Explain why you hate them." Here goes nothing:

1. "Should"

Nothing ticks me off more than someone telling me I "should" be doing something. According to who? Stop telling what I "should" be doing...I AM doing what I "should" be doing. YOU "should" shut the hell up!

2. "Malignant"

Not much to say, other than it scares the hell out of me. It seems so many people I know have either had cancer, or have it. Not a good word.

3. "Nigger"

Do I need to explain? A horribly offensive word.

4. "Episiotomy"

Ewww. It conjures up some gruesome images.

5. "Odor"

Whether or not it's a pleasant "odor" or a foul "odor" the word itself grosses me out. It makes me think of farting.

Okay peeps, if you want to do this one, let me know. I enjoyed myself immensely thinking of these. It doesn't take much to entertain this soccer mom.

Yee Ha!!!

I wish someone would put my head on that bod!

It really is a great look, rugged and sexy at the same time.

The glasses and the bun add just a touch of professionalism to an otherwise playful ensemble and the gun adds a really nice touch. I'm not sure if you read Vogue, but rifles are indeed all the rage this season. If you want to be a fashion icon YOU HAVE TO TAKE RISKS!

Just a suggestion to the genius who created this work of art.

Why not Photoshop Todd Palin's head on the dude smoking in the background? Maybe throw a moose or two in the bushes...

That would elevate this photo to PERFECTION!

Remember...it's all in the details!

Footnote: About two minutes after I posted this I received a phone call from a friend who asked if I saw the photo of Sarah Palin in a bikini holding a gun. SHE THOUGHT IT WAS REAL!!! Someone got an A + in Photoshop 101. Someone else flunked their I.Q. test.

I'm not pointing any fingers...just making an observation.

Tennis Tuesday (I WISH!)

No tennis for me today. I couldn't even watch the US Open. WHY?

Because tomorrow is the first day of school!!!

We were busy, busy, BUSY!!! School shopping, packing up school supplies, painting nails, laying out clothes, charging the camera and getting everyone to bed early.

Whew.

Tomorrow, from 9 am until 1 pm (half day)....for the first time in MONTHS, I will have some "alone time." I'll miss my girls, but it's time.


When summer started we were all so excited, and we've had a great time, but now, we're ready for the next season. The girls need the stimulation and structure they get at school. I need to be able to run to the bank, the dry cleaners, and the supermarket without hearing the constant ongoing chorus from the back seat of the minivan, "Turn on Miley Cyrus!" "She hit me!" "I'm thirsty!!" "I'm BORED!!!"

The really exciting part? I get to start playing tennis again!!! Yipee!!

Stimulation and structure for the kids, tennis and alone time for mom...

It's a win-win situation!

"Almost" Perfect

A friend of mine (who has breast implants) e-mailed me an article about a high school senior who died recently while undergoing breast augmentation surgery. Here are some excerpts from the article.

"Her friends said she was "perfect," so when she died Saturday of complications from breast augmentation surgery, none of them could understand how the girl whose success in life "was a sure thing" could perish in such a strange and devastating fashion."

"She had a charmed life: captain of the varsity cheerleading squad , a nearly perfect grade-point average, good looks and a ticket to the University of -----, where she would start her journey toward becoming a medical doctor."


"She was a great athlete. And she had all of these other things going for her, too. She did everything well."

"---- had brains to match her beauty, friends said, earning a GPA above 4.0, acing advanced placement courses and earning an acceptance letter from the University of -----."

And now she's gone...because she was "almost perfect" according to our standards of beauty, but not quite. So at the age of 18 she went into an outpatient facility, was put under general anesthesia, and never woke up. What a senseless tragedy. The worst part is, she was already perfect. She was a smart, healthy 18 year old girl, and now she's gone, forever.

So heartbreaking.

Hug your daughters (and while you're at it, give yourself a hug.) And remember, you are perfect, just the way you are!

The Plot Thickens...

Palin confirms daughter's pregnancy

The Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin has announced that her 17-year-old daughter is pregnant, in an announcement intended to knock down rumors by liberal bloggers that Palin faked her own pregnancy to cover up for her child.

Bristol Palin, one of Palin's five children with her husband, Todd, is about five months pregnant and is going to keep the child and marry the father, the Palins said in a statement released by the campaign of Republican presidential candidate John McCain.

Bristol Palin made the decision on her own to keep the baby, McCain aides said.

"We have been blessed with five wonderful children who we love with all our heart and mean everything to us," the Palins' statement said.

"Our beautiful daughter Bristol came to us with news that as parents we knew would make her grow up faster than we had ever planned. As Bristol faces the responsibilities of adulthood, she knows she has our unconditional love and support," the Palins said.

The Palins asked the news media to respect the young couple's privacy.

"Bristol and the young man she will marry are going to realize very quickly the difficulties of raising a child, which is why they will have the love and support of our entire family. We ask the media, respect our daughter and Levi's privacy as has always been the tradition of children of candidates," the statement concluded.

Senior McCain campaign officials said McCain knew of the daughter's pregnancy when he selected Palin last week as his vice presidential running mate, deciding that it did not disqualify the 44-year-old governor in any way.

In the short period since she was announced last Friday, Palin has helped to energize the Republican Party's conservative base, giving the McCain camp fresh energy going into the campaign for the November 4th election against Democrat Barack Obama.

McCain officials said the news of the daughter's pregnancy was being released to rebut what one aide called "mud-slinging and lies" circulating on liberal blog sites.

According to these rumors, Sarah Palin had faked a pregnancy and pretended to have given birth in May to her fifth child, a son named Trig who has Down syndrome. The rumor was that Trig was actually Bristol Palin's child and that Sarah Palin was the grandmother.

A senior McCain campaign official said the McCain camp was appalled that these rumors had not only been spread around liberal blog sites and partisan Democrats, but also were the subject of heightened interest from mainstream news media.

"The despicable rumors that have been spread by liberal blogs, some even with Barack Obama's name in them, is a real anchor around the Democratic ticket, pulling them down in the mud in a way that certainly juxtaposes themselves against their 'campaign of change,'" a senior aide said.

Reality is indeed stranger than fiction!