My favorite (and the one that made my skin crawl is the louse or common head lice....ewww) Anyone who has been fortunate enough to have tangled with these little suckers will appreciate how realistic these little suckers are!)We make stuffed animals that look like tiny microbes—only a million times actual size! Now available: The Common Cold, The Flu, Sore Throat, Stomach Ache, Cough, Ear Ache, Bad Breath, Kissing Disease, Athlete's Foot, Ulcer, Martian Life, Beer & Bread, Black Death, Ebola, Flesh Eating, Sleeping Sickness, Dust Mite, Bed Bug, and Bookworm (and in our Professional line: H.I.V. and Hepatitis).
Each 5-to-7 inch doll is accompanied by an image of the real microbe it represents, as well as information about the microbe.
They make great learning tools for parents and educators, as well as amusing gifts for anyone with a sense of humor!
The most popular series among the college crowd is:
Here is our little friend...Chlamydia
Say hello to Herpes Simplex Virus 2!
Let's have a round of applause for Gonorrhea (affectionately known as "The Clap")
Who knew STDs could be so DANG cute!!
Bladder full legs crossed
Exit, park, RUN!!! Damn...long line
Open door, gag...squat
Don't touch!!! Wash your hands!
Cinnabon, Sbarro's, Starbuck's
Five dollar latte
Buckle, merge, cruise
Mmmmm caffeine yummy
Bladder full legs crossed
Repeat for 200 miles
5 Random Things About Me:
1. I love drinking milk. I could drink a gallon a day...but I don't want to weigh 200 lbs.
2. My hair, nails and cuticles grow REALLY fast. I should get my hair cut/colored once a month (or more) and I SHOULD shave my legs every day.
3. I love talk radio and news radio...Dr. Joy Browne, Bill O'Reilly, NPR, 1010 WINS in NY...everything except call in sports shows.
4. I cannot believe I'm over 40 and really need to embrace my age. Every time a young adult calls me ma'am I cringe...even though I know they are being polite. (TOTALLY a topic for a post.)
5. I completely try to convince myself when I play tennis that it's all about having fun...but I love to WIN!!! (I do hide how glad I am when I win...I hate when people jump up and down like they won the Miss America pageant when they win a USTA match...I find that really embarrassing!)
If you haven't already done this...go for it! (Make sure you tell me when you do...)
I want to put your minds at ease. I am NOT a 500 lb. pervert....
"Small children disturb your sleep, big children, your life."
You should see me right now...I'm wearing ratty underwear, I have a huge zit and I'm picking my nose...okay I'm not really picking my nose-but I could be and you'd never know... kind of like when you're talking on the phone with a friend and then you hear the toilet flush in the background...ewwww.. And you thought I was a nice suburban housewife and mom...with manners!!!
Maybe I'm pulling a MySpace on you and I'm really a a 500 lb. perverted man who's turned on by rapping with the ladies about coupons and Target!
I assure you I'm not. I'll be meeting Lunanik within the next few weeks-and she can vouch that I am indeed female, with children, that I DO drive a minivan. (And probably that I have a huge zit!)
I wonder is there are any weirdo bloggers out there who assume a false identity or persona-just for kicks? Food for thought.
Thankfully I've been married 10 years, so I never had to "internet date." But my friends who have had horror stories about meeting up with dudes who had really attractive pictures on their profiles and turned up butt ugly when they met for their date.
Is this post random or what?
Okay, it's time for my point. My point is...those of you who read my blog have never met me. You like my blog persona. Some of you are GOING to meet me...and it will be strange to finally chat face to face. It'll be like a blind date!! I hope I don't disappoint...
Thanks to Nikki at Secrets of a Black Heart, those days are back! She turned me on the the Extra Care Card at CVS, and I've gone hog wild. In the past few weeks I have acquired a huge variety of beauty products-CHEAP. Nexxus, Biore, Neutrogena, John Frieda... I've got a vanity chock full of intensive anti-wrinkle serums, warming cream cleansers, hair color glazes-you name it!
I have to admit-I was not huge on products for my hair. Now that I'm making the transition from short and orange to my goal of shoulder length-with gorgeous highlights, all my new purchases have made a huge difference in the way my hair looks.
I was never into coupons either. I thought they a huge pain in the butt. All that has changed (for the time being-I have a VERY short attention span!) I'm loving getting all kinds of goodies-PRACTICALLY FREE. It's like a new hobby-so much fun!
If you don't have the CVS card-get it! You'll get to try out all these fun products for almost no money. Each week when I get my flyer it's like a little game of strategy to get the most swag for the least amount of cash.
Through Nikki-I've discovered an entire subculture. I never knew there were so many websites and blogs dedicated to saving big bucks on the products we use everyday.
Money Saving Mom is one of the better coupon blogs...she has all kinds of schemes to save you money!
So here's the point of this post:
#1 Are you into creams ,elixirs and all the potions on the market that promise to make our hair silky smooth and our faces wrinkle free? Any favorites?
I am LOVING the Nexxus Sleek Memory Straightening Smoothing Spray. It smells amazing and my hair looks really shiny after I use it.
#2 How about coupons and sales? Are you a money saving maven? If so, let us in on your secrets!
Which reminds me... When I was a kid, in about 2nd or 3rd grade, we had an ice cream man in our neighborhood who was VERY FRIENDLY. Every day, my sister and I would run around the corner when my mom wasn't looking and climb in the truck with this dude. We would then proceed to drive all over town, waiting on our friends. After an hour or so we would get dropped off back around the corner. Mom never found out.
In hindsight, I can't believe none of our neighbors called my mom to tell on us!! Thirty five years later my sister and I are alive and well, and not nearly as enamored as we once were with that little white truck, chock full of frozen goodies. (Although you should have seen me when I was pregnant, I would waddle my big fat pregnant body down the street like nobody's business to beat all the neighborhood kids to the front of the line!!! But that's a whole nother post!)
Posted by Caffeine Court at 1:16 PM
I finally got to watch the final episode of "Real Housewives of NYC." I haven't commented on the show for quite awhile, so I'll give a general overview.
You know what...I'll give you the PG rated version with the boobies crossed out. If you want the rated R version you're going to have to do a little work.
I've never seen two people so desperate to be famous, no matter what the cost.
Next up, my favorite......LuAnn the Countess. Most people don't seem to like her. I've heard comments that she is a fake byotch and that she would crush ANYONE who gets in her way...maybe I'm a bad judge of character because I kind of like her! She seems to have a good sense of humor (except when it comes to "the help" calling her by her first name!) I love her clothes, her house her children. I love it all. I think I want to BE LuAnn! I was very touched by the scene where she helped the woman recovering from drug addiction with her interviewing skills. She seems like a genuinely caring person. (At least when the cameras are rolling!) It was a bit surprising to discover that her husband is on marriage #4. He must be a handful, but it seems she can handle it!
It looks like next week Jill goes off on Ramona and calls her an idiot during the "Real Housewives Reunion" interview. Oy vey!
Later tonight...I'm watching my recording of the season premiere of "Workout." (Another Bravo show that I love.) Any other "Workout" fans out there?
Posted by Caffeine Court at 6:49 PM
Some of you might be thinking-so what? What's the big deal. TRUST ME, it is a big deal for me. I am very good an getting in the car (okay minivan-whatever) and running around town getting things done. When it comes to staying in the house and puttering away at the minuscule little things that add up to a disaster when avoided, I stink.
Which leads me to another subject. My new obsession... I am really getting into this whole King Henry the Eighth thing and I need to discuss it! Later on I want to chat about "The Tudors," "The Other Boleyn Girl" (book as well as movie), Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Natalie Portman...all of it!
Posted by Caffeine Court at 10:14 AM
I am seriously embarrassed posting this...but I wanted to give some of you a chance to say "I told you so!!"
Posted by Caffeine Court at 10:20 AM
If my either of my daughters ever dates a guy who wears one of these t-shirts...
I was just informed by my neighbor, that the show runs approximately 2 hours and 45 minutes. That's 2 hours and 45 minutes of lip synching, dance routines performed and choreographed by 4th graders and drum solos by 8th grade boys.
Her best friend's mom called two hours ago to see if Meg would like to sleep over tomorrow night. This means we have one night that she won't get in bed before 11 and another where she'll probably stay up until midnight. Sh---t!
I REALLY want to bag out of the talent show. If I do, my child will be very upset. Oh the things we mothers have to go through!!!!
My choice. Suck it up, go to the show. suffer through it and have two exhausted children. (There is no way my 4 year old will stand for staying home!)
Or, tell her to choose between the sleepover or the show...she'll be mad, but life is all about making tough choices, is it not?
These are the executive decisions I, as head of household Monday through Friday, get to make. Either way, it's not going to be pretty.
A final note: To those of you wondering how they could have a "talent show" (and I use that term loosely) that lasts almost three hours...here's how. There are 500 children in the school. ANYONE who wants to perform is in...NO CUTS. There were 40 acts and an emcee that loved to hear his own voice and jokes in between acts. That adds up to one LONG ASS SHOW.
Posted by Caffeine Court at 4:59 PM
In the meantime, if you hear of any high paying jobs in Central Jersey that would allow me to work from 9:30-2:30, (September through June, with days off for school vacations) wear jeans, and not have to sit behind a desk, leave a comment.
Oh well. I'm back in my flannel pjs and sporting a pair of Uggs. Hopefully this chilly weather won't last too long...I'm ready for Summer!!!
Posted by Caffeine Court at 8:06 AM
I'm packed, and spray-tanned, my fingernails and toenails are all cleaned and polished and we're off to Florida...we'll be back Tuesday night.
They're happy, so I'm happy. (Except when I shell out $12 an hour for a babysitter-JUST KIDDING MOM!)
How much sleep do you need?
Not how much do you get, how much do you NEED to feel good?
How about you?
(I just had a flashback to the newborn years, nursing every two hours, no sleep...oh the HORRORS!) But those little infants are so dang cute!!
Once we get there I'm sure it will be a fun and relaxing visit. It's the preparations that are KILLING me!
My mission: to get two adults, two children, two dogs and one cat prepared for the upcoming journey.
So much to do and so little time!!
My solution? Avoid packing and start blogging!
Now all I need to do is:
- Stop mail
- bring dogs to kennel
- get summer clothes for me and hubby out of the basement
- pack (for EVERYONE hubby has business obligations the next two nights)
- get manicure, pedicure and spray tan (mommys got to look foxy!)
- complete every other day to day task a mom must do including chauffeuring, cooking, cleaning, laundry, school volunteering, paying bills...need I say more?
Until then I'll be clutching a to-do list in one hand and a huge cup of joe in the other. (I'll be steering the car with my teeth!)
Catch you later!
“A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest,
accompanied by a mother who sees that the others get it.”
Posted by Caffeine Court at 9:06 AM